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We’re tweaking! Not the fun, drug-crazed kind. The chasing down inconsequential details and reconfiguring software repeatedly kind.

So far, we’ve installed new hardware, new software, and new UI. It’s like Christmas, if Christmas involved putting together your own toys and then checking them repeatedly to see if you’d accidentally wired them to blow up.

BTW, Panino wants to spend some time redrawing the characters. We have some older character templates and he wants them all upgraded to the latest and greatest. Whereas I’d rather publish again pronto and fine-tune the visuals later.

Your thoughts?

Posted on 7-16-2011

Refers to bad guys after they’ve pissed off the mob. Also refers to zombies. And tired lawyers. I sense an unpleasant theme there.

After an excessive number of late nights at the office, I’ve noticed that lawyers get a feral glint in their bloodshot eyes. More physical proof of the Jekyll/Hyde that is a lawyer’s personality. Awful rabid predator and … person who hates being an awful rabid predator.

BTW, I haven’t slept in a few days. Fair warning.

Posted on 7-13-2011

So, here’s the silver lining to not having updated in so long: Sky, Kate, and Co. can kill their Tumblr accounts and it can be updated for Google+. That’ll be a lot easier, since ‘Nino and I are on G+ all the time anyway.

BTW, Google+ looks like a half-finished equation. And G+ looks like a failing grade, or a reference to G-spots. Maybe that’s just me?

Posted on 7-11-2011

A reader wrote to ask when the next strip is coming up. Panino and I exchanged looks of glee and guilt. (This is a common combination of emotions for us. There should be a new expression called glilt, to cover these circumstances.)

Glee because we now have a really good excuse to buy some new hardware and software, and, y’know, start story-telling again.

Guilt because we didn’t do it sooner. But that’s true for everything (except getting caught — I’m never sorry I didn’t get caught sooner). So, guilt-schmilt! Onwards and upwards!

I promised to have the next strip up this month, and to be on a twice-weekly schedule thereafter. Any preferences on which two days?

Posted on 7-10-2011

…I’ll spare you the details, but sporks are produced the result. Which is why you should always keep your utensils in separate, individual, plastic baggies!

And in comic-related news, we’re on the kind of schedule that we can keep…which is currently no schedule at all. We dropped everything when Nino’s dad was sick and we’ve been 100% family-focused after he passed away.

The good news is that our respective jobs are moving forward, which keeps the roof over our heads, which keeps the Wacom tablet safe from harm. And thus, comic strips will still come out sporadically.

BTW, Sydney hasn’t kicked her kleptomania completely. We just didn’t think it was fair for her to regress during our hiatus. Kleptomania + Sydney’s brand new retail venture = trouble! More explanation to come.

Posted on 9-16-2010

Both of us are working on imminent motions for summary judgment. This is what it’s like in a household with two lawyers banging away at MSJs:

Nino: ARRRRRRRGH! No docs from the client to support this. None. I hate him.

Miche: Shhh. Hush. It’s okay. You’ll find something.

Miche: ARRRRRGH! I can’t get a declaration to vouch for this. There goes my legal support. We’re toast.

Nino: Hey, hey. Relax. You’ll figure it out.

Nino & Miche, in unison: ARRRRGH! If Windows Update tries to restart one more time, I’m going fly to Seattle and beat Bill Gates into a bloody pulp!

Yeah, it’s fun times here. We’re keepin’ it real — real stressful, that is.

Posted on 8-4-2010

Family stuff has settled into something manageable. Comics to resume next Monday. Did you miss us as much as we missed you? :-)

Posted on 7-28-2010

Sorry we haven’t been around. Nino’s dad is very sick, and the next few months are going to be pretty rough-going for the whole family.

We’ll keep posting updates whenever possible. Though the stories will progress more slowly, the joy of comic characters is that they stay bright and beautiful whenever you return to ‘em.

Sending a friendly wave from the Sharp and Useless universe!

Posted on 3-2-2010

…Um, I mean, era. Whatever. :-)

News! First, our web-guru has created some guru-iffic things. We will install those things this week and then tell you how they work. Unless, of course, we blow up in the process. In which case, please tell our mamas we thought of them at the end.

Second, we are tinkering with an iPhone app. Even though we’re both diehard G1 fans. It has to do with the wonderfulness of James Harknell and Co. More info to follow, once we finalize our features.

Third, the big big case that I’ve been toiling away on is coming close to resolution. You’ll see more of me, and the web will see more of Sharp and Useless, as I surface for air.

Fourth, we have discovered homemade ice cream. Correspondingly, we strongly recommend David Lebovitz’s book, The Perfect Scoop.

Fifth, please send questions to TaterTot at [email protected] … he’s going to do a Q&A strip this month, as part of an annual tradition.

Posted on 1-11-2010

Like Spiderman, but with PHP!

We’re meeting with someone who could, fingers crossed, become the guy who does our “honey-do” web stuff. We will ply him with caffeine and big, soulful eyes, until he agrees. Wish us luck.

Posted on 12-5-2009

I spent all day today doing things out of the office. Sometimes it’s nice to be out — new scenery, better food, less paper-shuffling. Today, it was just a headache — voicemails, e-mails, and unbilled time piled up.

Two things I’ve found:

1. When you come back to the office, you repeat yourself. You go from office to office, explaining all the new things you’ve learned and the things you’ve done in your absence.

2. You miss out on socialization. Interoffice socialization isn’t the same thing as normal socialization, btw. It’s more “team building” meets grumpiness, rather than friendship meets alcohol and bad judgment. Very little accidental smooching. Plenty of jabby, passive-aggressive convos.

Posted on 12-4-2009

My firm has a surfeit of them. And all of the firm’s vendors are throwing happy hours and get-togethers, too. For efficiency’s sake, I suggest one designated party day, with videoconferencing as necessary.

Or start letting me BILL to attend these things. That would be a great holiday gift, thanks.

Posted on 12-3-2009

I love authors who provide free and substantial samples of their work. I think it’s exactly what you’d do if you walked into a bookstore and began flipping through the books to see if you like them. It amazes me that more authors don’t take this route.

I’ve never read J.C. Hutchins before, but he evidently writes a 7th Son techno-thriller trilogy with episodic monthly updates. It’s a podcast novel, and it was strongly recommended by TWC. I’ll definitely take a look at it this week!

7S_250x250

Posted on 11-29-2009

A couple of readers have asked us why Sydney’s hair and eye color keep changing. The answer is that Sydney practically lives at a funky hair salon in Venice Beach, and she owns two dozen sets of Hollywood FX-grade contact lenses. (Convenient perks for the well-off and fashion-fluid.) :-)

Maybe this belongs under Q&A, but Sydney is too shy to show up on that page just yet… I guess she’s afraid her parents will try to reach her through that channel.

Posted on 11-28-2009

This beautiful Friday is absolutely hampered by various legal concerns. Hmf.

I would complain more, but I feel guilty when the court reporter isn’t complaining.

And why is that? Every court reporter I’ve ever met has had a sense of humor, an inextinguishable supply of patience, and an excellent memory. Why would court reporters be nice people, surrounded as they are by contentious lawyers and never-ending depositions? It’s probably a Stepford kind of thing; they’re well-trained robots.

Posted on 11-20-2009

After much trial-and-error tweaking, we think we may have finally overcome Internet Explorer’s infamous rendering bugs. Or, at least, we’ve got a site that appears to display properly on IE7 and IE8, on our Vista and XP machines.

We don’t have a copy of IE6, which some behind-the-times companies are still forcing upon their staff. Therefore, we can’t say with 100% certainty that we’ve fixed the IE problems…

If you’re having difficulty viewing the comic, please send us an e-mail and let us know.

Thanks!

Posted on 11-19-2009

A reader just alerted us to the fact that carnivorous Internet Explorer doesn’t display our comic strip anymore. It useta. Now it doesn’t. Evidently, an Internet Explorer user can’t see our comic on the home page OR through archives. An IE user can only view our strip by clicking on the RSS Feed.

More proof that Firefox > IE.

No, I’m kidding! Seriously, this is a bug that we’ll address immediately. Sorry for the hassle, folks. We’re still up and running….you just can’t tell. :-/

Posted on 11-18-2009

We need a better system for indicating that the Q & A page has been updated. Maybe one of those FLASHING THINGS! “Update! Update! Update!” And a klaxon alarm.

No, really. We want to organize the Q & A page to sort the questions by topic, and have some automated process that publishes a one-line update on the blog concerning site maintenance. This is also applicable for when we set up a store and start to update with various merchandise.

*puts it on the list of webby stuff to do*

*notices that the list of webby stuff to do is getting longer and longer*

Posted on 11-17-2009

Google Analytics tells us how many people are looking at our site and where those visitors live. We try not to check every day — after all, we’re a fledgling site and we should be spending time on content! The readership issue can be addressed later. But we indulge now and again. Every time we do, Panino clicks on the map and marvels that people from faraway cities and countries are reading our comic.

There’s a Kim Wilde song I like called “Kids In America.” Exhibiting an adorable grasp of geography, Ms. Wilde trills that all the kids in America, from New York to East California, are living for the music-go-round.

Nino and I are living for the comic-go-round. Thank you to all the kids from New York to East California, and outside of the United States, for peeping your eyes at our site. :-) Please pass along the message and the URL. Eventually, we hope to have a presence in west California, too. :-p

Posted on 11-17-2009

As promised, here’s a shout-out to Teresa Thompson, a real life person who really linked to our comic. Thanks again for reading!

Bonus Strip #1

Posted on 11-14-2009

Miche: I love radio plays. Sharp and Useless should have radio plays.
Panino: What’s a radio play?

*Miche explains*

Panino: Okay. So, we’d need to get good voice actors, a recording space, equipment, software, and the time…
Miche: Yes, that’s true.
Panino: …so that we could tell a story using conversation instead of comics?
Miche: Er. Yes, I suppose.
Panino: Let’s get right on that…after we, you know, establish our COMIC STRIP first.
Miche, chastened: Okay.

*Miche, plotting a radio play behind Nino’s back*

Posted on 11-13-2009

Kate: kate-su.tumblr.com
Sky: sky-su.tumblr.com
Bailey: bailey-su.tumblr.com

The Tumblr pages will be updated daily, Monday through Friday, with character-appropriate posts. Feel free to befriend them! Fictional people are still people!

We’re figuring out how to widget-ly host the Tumblr posts on the Sharp & Useless home page, too.

Edit to add: And now those Tumblr blogs are dead. Long live Google+!

Posted on 11-11-2009

Entirely without being paid, and altogether without any kinship ties, and even without being forced by means foul and violent, Teresa Thompson listed Sharp & Useless as one of the “Comics I Like.”

This is our first referral link! We can’t go to sleep. We’re beaming at each other and hitting refresh repeatedly. LOOK! Right THERE is our webcomic! Referenced on someone else’s page! Without money, blood, or threat of physical harm! :-) :-)

P.S. We’re drawing a strip for Teresa, to commemorate the momentous occasion. It should be posted as a bonus strip this week.

Posted on 11-11-2009

Setting up Tumblr accounts for Kate, Sky, and Bailey today. Also, a Facebook account for the strip.

Very soon, Sharp & Useless characters are going to have more active social lives than we do! (Which isn’t that difficult a feat. I think pre-schoolers with play dates have more active social lives than we do.)

Posted on 11-9-2009

Today, we discovered that there is such a thing as Google PageRank. We also discovered that our PageRank is zero. This is what happens when you start a webcomic — you write a story, you draw some characters, you find someone to host your website, you find software to help you design your website…and then you find out everything else, by happenstance and random stumbling. It’s like being drunk, without the alcohol. :-)

Posted on 11-8-2009

Awful enough that lawyers meet. More awful that they’re meeting early in the morning. Awfullest of all that it’s a strategy session. It could conceivably last until I die.

Posted on 11-6-2009

Not the kind off dress shirts. Button ads — slightly bigger than Miche’s thumb, slightly smaller than Panino’s. We placed bids via Project Wonderful. Exciting! (This is the nascent stages of webcomickery, when everything is exciting. :) )

Posted on 11-5-2009

With luck, and Panino’s sharp eyesight, today may be is the grand unveiling of a functional blog! Woot!

Posted on 11-5-2009

Klondike should pay us for the product plug.

Posted on 11-3-2009

2GB more RAM than before. Illustrator is running SO fast…this strip is being written from the future!

Posted on 11-2-2009